(Ignore Bradgelina…hear Mrs. Patti Labelle)
From watching Bridezilla (since I don’t have a life) and noticing weddings for four decades, I have concluded that some people want the pageantry of a wedding without thinking about the long-term commitment of being bonded “until death do you part.” Some women think about being lovely brides (queen for a day) without thinking about being a wife with all the ups and downs of cohabitation. Too many fellows ignore the “forsaking all others” part of the vows; “thick and thin” could refer to the times or waistlines. I know guys who got married before they start making money and now complain that women are checking them out since they have $40K cars.
There are some women who actually seek to “date” married men for reasons that escape me. If you met him creeping, he is a creeper, genius. Since birds of a feather often flock together, keep us single guys out of your mess—don’t start with that “if you see my wife at the store, you and I have been hanging out more lately” stuff to cover where you have actually been. Oh no, my name is Paul and that mess is between you’ all.
Speaking of Paul, the local newspaper has a Bible verse everyday and today it was Titus 2:1 “But as for you, speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine.” Since I didn’t half pay attention in Sunday School as a kid, I just learned today that the Book of Titus is Paul’s letters to Titus who was on Crete. The rest of Chapter 2 was good information for couples.
Titus 2:9 is controversial in some Black circles because it is one of the “servants obey your masters” selections that was used to justify American slavery. Hey, Titus 2:5 deals with women being in subjugation to their husbands and the sistas I know don’t and shouldn’t play that. I better leave that alone.
This topic appears on a political blog because my friends and I are talking about a new brand of moderate/conservative thinking that grows from the particular needs of our community and functions without validation, approval or authorization from the current political establishment. At some point, you get tried of waiting and realize “we are who we have been waiting for.” Some things need to be said by those with constructive intend. Since government should play a limited role in the lives of Americans, we need more leaders who will say that, give examples of life planning that reflects that and help young people learn the possible consequences of poor planning. Policy needs teeth because reasonable people are weary of taking care of others’ poor decision-making.
If you are not ready to be a spouse or parent, skip the process. The problem is that many who aren’t ready don’t realize it. Contrary to popular believe, single folks are very happy to see positive families. Single people like me respect the institution of marriage so much that we would never think about entering into it lightly and the same can be said about parenthood.
A couple that is truly ready should consider the Patti Labelle song from the Waiting to Exhale soundtrack “My Love, Sweet Love” for a first dance at their wedding. (You know Patti is from Albany, Georgia.) If the jam “No Diggity” fits your situation, wait awhile…you have some growing to do.
blackstreet – No Diggity (Das Diggity Radio – Greatest Remix
At 3:00 in this song, the DJ put in the best remix feature ever. A Native American is chanting so smoothly.